Hipster hikers and learning to pack

Leave all hope for a solitary walk through the jungles and ancient ruins in whatever Belgian university cafe you first planned this trip in. It was arduous but not incredibly so; I saw a grown man hike for 5 days wearing ball-tight skinny jeans just large enough for his "equipment" and a pack of Lucky Strike Menthols.

Prepare for exceptionally awful tan/burn lines and more haggling over an apparently limitless supply of 3 variations of llama-knit sweaters than you ever thought possible. The food was great, although shitting in the woods every four hours was less so.

"4.5/5, would conquer this trek again." - F. Pizarro, 1521